Genetic Manipulation, Nuclear Fission and The Law Of Attraction

The law of attraction is basically the belief that what you believe in (read: think a lot about) comes into your life.

The wonderful thing LOA (law of attraction) is that, by definition, it’s the sort of thing that will only work if you believe in it. Or at least have a sneaking suspicion that there’s more going on behind the scenes of life than the naked eye would suggest.

As soon as I found out about this magical law of the universe, I I began applying it with the fervor and foolishness of a recently sexually liberated teenager.

I went through that phase too but it shall never be posted about anywhere ever 🙂

The thing about LOA is that for me it works. And I got really really good at it. I studied and practiced it 24/7 for years.
Practice makes perfect.

I listened to Abraham hicks in my sleep, I watched the movie The Secret around 20 times and much more. After about 5 years I had manifested checks for thousands of dollars, went to my dream school with a free ride. Met and dated women who matched silly amounts of detail and ended up living in houses that met my exact expectations. Oh and there was that AWESOME bender in Vegas that I didn’t know how I was going to pull off but totally did. Still amazes me.

Seems great, right?

To paraphrase Malcolm from Jurassic Park (on the recreation of dinosaurs-also watched that movie 29 times) “Just because I could doesn’t mean that I should.”

All of the relationships ended in tears and heartache. I had to leave that school as I was a mess. My apartment by the mountains with a loft and a fireplace in my room, was a mess and I had to leave. It wasn’t all bad. I had great times, but It was so painful. I had to go on a manifestation hiatus.

Like any other powerful tool, (talking to you, nuclear fission) it had to being guided by wisdom, love, and reason or else it would be destructive.

But I understand the scientists who said “hey-for all we know, detonating an atomic bomb might destroy THE ENTIRE KNOWN UNIVERSE but let’s give it a shot!” It was powerful and tempting. Luckily the analogy ends there.

I did develop the wisdom to guide me through this. I learned that I have to be very specific about what I want, what to create, what is wise sensible and is not based in some absurd fear. I had to know myself first. I had healing to do. And luckily I’ve learned how to use the coolest skill ever: how to re-align my beliefs with a desired outcome.

It’s more like goal setting with a little metaphysical flavor now. I am certain that I will succeed at my goals because they are chosen with care and I have many experiences backing up my ability to achieve them. I’m just capable of being more honest with myself about what they truly are.

I’ll post some manifestation 101 stuff on here. It’s really my favorite thing to talk about, teach about and learn about.

Thanks for reading,

A Friendly Universe is An Awesome Place to Be.

If my life were a joke, the punch line would be that I’m perfect the way I am, and the whole universe is brimming with love for me. I’m pretty sure that’s the gist of it for a lot of us.

I used to think that my optimism and love of life was one of those childish things that would get beaten out of me as time went on and I would wind up like so many people who are dissatisfied by their lives/jobs/family/spouses.

But it’s just the opposite. By paying attention to life, refusing to do what I hate and choosing to learn my life’s lessons quickly (often earned through tremendous pain) I find my love of life growing deeper as I age. It wasn’t easy! But much much easier in the long run than trying to be someone else or following the wrong path.

Now I get to be in on the joke. I’m perfect and the whole universe loves me. Reminding myself of this truth is much like clicking together my ruby slippers and coming back home.

I had to come out of my shell of almost 3 decades of questioning this, worrying about problems that weren’t there, or even better, ones that solved themselves when I stopped trying to fix them.

This isn’t to say that I haven’t been through tremendous amounts of shit. I’ve dug myself out from at least nine lifetime’s worth so far. And a few times barely alive. Clearly, I lived to share the tail and love doing so.

I remembered through most of it that once, I saw noticed something suspiciously awesome about life. And I wasn’t going to give up until I knew what that was.

It turns out that the whole universe is thrilled about me. And it goes both ways.

Pretty much everything else my mind is just making up, and can be discarded relatively easily.

As a pretty decent scientist once stated, The most important question you can ask yourself is whether you live in a friendly universe.

I’d have to answer “Certainly”. Maybe not all of its inhabitants, but overall this place is really awesome.

And it’s all free for the enjoyment. As are awesome people, places, passions, sights, and sounds. And ideas. And a bunch of other nouns.

The whole thing is that it’s always going to be like this. And it always has. The circumstances. Often are beyond our control but the awakened eye is not. It seems to happen to different people at different times. Usually preceded by great turmoil.

Waking up to all of this is awkward and painful. Living in a land of fear to awaken to a Universe that loves you and has been there the whole time is like living in a dark cave for years and then having sunlight pour into your eyes.

However the pupils adjust, the fear was all an illusion and life goes on but with a new shine. And it’s well worth it.

Have a wonderful day!

Just thought I’d share the enthusiasm about existing.


What is love? My definition, my inspiration and a question for you.

I’m a big fan of self-love. Actually, love in general. While this is hard when in pain depression grief or any situation, it’s often part of the solution as well. Love has gotten me through it all. Especially love from others.

I had to ask myself “what the heck is love anyway?!”

And I learned that it is something that comes before words yet can inform them.

It’s something that I can express within my actions, thoughts and words but can only define for myself.

So let’s define! For me, love is the impulse to connect, to survive and thrive, to grow to share and to protect and nurture.

I suppose it’s analogous to the will to live but it is also life itself.

Some cultures have many different words for different kinds of love. My love of say, my iPhone is one of appreciation of an object that I relate to daily, and there is sentiment attached. I am protective of her and sometimes neglectful. I make sure that she gets recharged while I sleep.

My love of my body is in many ways different. Boy also has needs such as sleep food nurturing, care, is touch sensitive but has a much more intimate relationship with me. I’m a big fan of body too. However I would never ever return him to the apple store for a new one. Very very attached. Without him, this life would end! I’m eternally grateful for this vehicle through the third dimension :p

My love of self, the divine and the souls I encounter along the way is much more sacred to me. This connection I see as eternal. Now while my body and iPhone are very helpful for facilitating connection with other people, it is my love of humanity that is most important to me. It keeps me going. Gives me invaluable purpose that can endure any pain.

It’s this love that has given me the strength to see myself through disease, addiction, hopelessness and despair.

Because I love you guys. And even after years of feeling isolated and disconnected I persevered because I wanted to feel connected to you again.

So thank you, humans for being so wonderful that I want nothing more than to hang out and be a part of the coolest pack of mammals in town (sorry dolphins)


What does love mean to you? How has it play a role in your life?
– with love, Ammanuel

The Tao of Alcoholism: How To Be Awesomely Proactive & Propassive

Pre-gaming is a great concept that often gets a bad wrap, because of its roots in binge drinking culture.

Once upon a time I was the master of this form of pre-gaming, drinking before going to the bar or party, to better “prepare” oneself for upcoming fun. I matched this proactive approach to my alcoholism along with the positive expectation that everything will work out and my night would be great.

This practice accomplished two things: Taking action ahead of time to ensure desired results (Proactive Awesomeness) as well as expecting things to fall into place (Propassive awesomeness).

It was around this time of my life when I first encountered Taoism, which is all about taking action when necessary and just chilling when there is nothing to be done. This creates a serene relaxed life that is also productive.

It’s occurred to me that these are pretty much the same thing.

I no longer drink but I apply these principles (as well as possible) to all aspects of my life. I tell myself “I’ve already won and everything falls into place.” It works so well it seems like magic but here’s how it actually works:

When I walk into a situation well prepared and expecting the best I am open to every opportunity for things to work my way and I accept them with grace. By expecting things to fall into place I allow myself to NOT interfere with things that area already working in my favor.

The opposite of self sabotage, I’ve now created a positive self fulfilling prophesy!

This is also an age old Taoist teaching. Knowing when to act and when not to interfere. This creates an effortless “non action”, meaning that my actions are in harmony with the moment and thus with the universe.

And then there is passivity, which is knowing when not to do a thing. This allows me to not worry and be fully prepared and relaxed for when things have to get done.

All of this allows me to be in tune with spirit and get what I want at the same time! (Having my cake and eating it too is Awesome!)

Try it out! Tell me how it works for you!


Eating Pizza, Killing Aliens & My Process of Forgiveness


I had a wonderfully terrible day. I mean it’s been a rough week in general, but today was the apex of this terribleness and I’m growing from it finally.My breaking point today was when I dropped my iPad and….broke it.

I knew that I was angry. And when we’re angry, we sabotage ourselves. In a fit of rage and panic I proceeded to curse out my therapist, purchase $50 dollars of candy and junk food, and on two hours of sleep, attempted to beat Mass Effect for the fifth time.

When the time honored tradition of eating pizza and killing aliens didn’t work I knew that I was in trouble. I passed out, woke up 5 hours later and remembered that the solution for anger is ultimately forgiveness. It wasn’t so much that I remembered, but  I was ready in some way. It was because I had finally been able to feel , be angry about and cry about the things that were hurting me. These are things that have been literally been there my entire life.

It wasn’t even until this morning that it really hit home what I was really angry about. Hell, probably the reason why I’ve had a lifelong videogame and pizza [insert euphemism for obsession here].

The things that I had to forgive aren’t what’s important. What’s important is what I’m doing about it and why it works. First of all, forgiveness is not something that can’t be done prematurely. I’ve tried that and it’s a waste of time. I had to feel my feelings, know where they were coming from, accept the way that the past had affected me, and most importantly, decide to take back control of my life through forgiveness.

Forgiveness of the past is something that I’m doing just for me. It’s not something that i’m doing for other people. It will increase my awesomeness, of course, because the anger of the past will lose it’s grip.

I’ve read about around a billion forgiveness exercises, but my favorite is simple visualizations and affirmations. What I do is use a simple such as “I forgive the past and set myself free” and allow everything that i’m angry about move through my mind. When I do that while reciting the affirmation to myself silently or out loud I can physically feel my body relax.

After posting this, I’ll probably do that for hours. If I feel like it, I’ll write it down, say it in a mirror to myself, say it outloud and keep doing so until I know it’s time to stop. And it’ll work. But it’ll work because I’ve felt my feelings, cried to my friends, cussed out my therapist, and, after breaking my ipad, immediately said to myself “I’m deciding to only let good come from this” meaning: whatever is happening, i’m going to make lemonade out of it.

A lot of people forgive for different reasons. Some believe that it’s just the right thing to do. Some people forgive for other people’s sake. Everyone probably really has a complex set of motivations and reasons for why they choose to forgive or not. I’m doing it primarily because forgiveness is choosing a future for myself that is not based on the pain of the past but the power of myself, my dreams, love and aspirations.

Thanks for reading.

“Are You Spiritual?” The Three Questions Cool Kids Don’t Have To Ask On The Temporal Playground


Often times people ask me if I’m religious. Without hesitation I answer “no”. Which is completely true. I’m not part of an organized religion. But I’ve always been a DIY sort of guy, so why should my relationship to the cosmos be any different?

However, more often, and in different circles i’m often asked if I consider myself “spiritual”.

This is an odd question. I used to be confused by this, but after a bit of processing I’ve come to understand that people are essentially asking me one of three things. These things, when translated into Ammanuel, read as follows:

1. “Are you aware that you’re an incredibly amazing, eternal being interacting with other incredibly amazing eternal beings in a temporal playground?”

2. “Do you choose to play well with others while on this temporal playground?”

3. “you’re not one of those crazy woo-woo crystal people are you?”

to which my true answer is: certainly, certainly and certainly.

However, number one is often combined with an implicit “If not, then can I help you? Or “If so, then can I show off how ‘spiritual’ I am?” [insert pithy analogy of spiritual materialism and playground dynamics here]

Number 2 is usually asked by someone who has a very rigid set of rules as to what “play well with others” means and intends on trying to impose those often very un-playful rules upon me.

To Number 3, I usually answer “no” and run away as quickly as possible.

The coolest people are those  who don’t have to ask me any of the above 3. We just meet each other with knowing eyes, and hang out on the temporal playground. We read crazy books about crystals and how to ultimately, have some serious fun. We grow in our Awesomeness and hone our skills on how to play with others. We work, we play, we cry.

A better question would be Ammanuel “are you, you?” To which I would answer with certainty: “Yes, and with growing fidelity each day.”

Which of course, would be a silly question to ask in the first place.

Kombucha and Open Source Software: Cultures of Abundance

“The fundamental act of friendship among programmers is the sharing of programs”
GNU Manifesto


I’ve decided to detox from a lot of things in life recently. I have stopped drinking, stopped smoking and have moved to using open source software and moving at a gradual pace towards veganism daily. I have chosen to detox because anything else would be stealing. Stealing is a self-declaration of poverty and thus not Awesome.

Let me explain, I used to “borrow” software, books, and music liberally with some very good and reasonable justifications behind them. However, honesty and fair exchange are more important to me than even being “right”. My spirituality comes first. So I deleted all of my “borrowed” corporate software, books and music. I downloaded the free, open source alternatives, donated each company a few bucks, enrolled in my library’s free ebook lending program and coughed up the ten dollars for my first month of Spotify.

Funny enough, that day every restaurant or caffe I went to everyone gave me food and drink for free so on my shoestring budget paying for these things was made very easy.

As for my dietary choices, not listening to my inner Awesomeness guide (which has demanded that I be a straight edge vegan for a long time) is stealing from myself and the planet. Happily I’ve found kombucha to be the ultimate alcohol-replacement.

By making these changes I have found things that are much cooler than their alternatives.
kombucha and the open source software both have great communities around them in which ideas are exchanged and things are given away for free. Instructions on how to program in any language are readily available online as are Kombucha-brewing instructions.

Both Kombucha and opensource software are products that can be home-brewed and rival their corporate counterparts (seriously my first homemade kombucha seen in the picture above is superior to anything I’ve found in Whole Foods).

But the reason why they’re both awesome is that they’re cultures of Abundance. Every batch of kombucha creates a new mother-bacteria culture that can be used to make…more kombucha! But because every batch creates more and each culture is re-usable, kombucha brewers happily gift and trade their cultures with each other. Thus more creates more, for free and almost demands sharing.

With open source software, the only thing you’d ever have to pay for is tech support or a donation, if you’re like me. Because of this, instead of doing something that I don’t want to do in order to save the hundreds of dollars for the Microsoft Office suite or thousands of dollars for the adobe suite, I can dedicate my time to writing fascinating articles that at least amuse me but hopefully are interesting to others. And programmers around the world get to do what they love.

Kombucha and open source software are examples of true abundance at work. Communities and cultures of sharing and Awesomeness breeding more Awesomeness.

I’ve included a slew of links below on everything that I have mentioned in passing above. I hope that you enjoy!

I hope that you enjoyed the read!

Articles On Kombucha and Open Source Terms
GNU Software License
Copy Left
How I made Kombucha

Great, Open Source Software
Gimp (free photoshop)
Songbird (The firefox of media players-tons of customizable plug-ins, works with non-apple products and the awesomeness goes on.)
Ubuntu (think windows but free. And every version works-unlike windows where a version works about once per decade. Will alsorun well on that old laptop in the corner and will look gorgeous on that new desktop)
Open Office (Will do everything MS office does but for…FREE!)

And if you’re sick of stealing music but want that same all you can eat buffet there’s always Spotify