One of the least fun things in life is shame!
It’s like we’re apologizing for something that isn’t even our fault. What happens when we feel shame or less than is that we hide it, and like most people, we don’t want to be hiding constantly. It’s exhausting and BORING!
What happens then is that we become ashamed of the fact that we have things we carry around, shameful secrets that are probably just normal and human, but we haven’t yet realized that it’s all perfectly okay. So we are ashamed of shame.
What do we do?
Well, the reason that shame sticks around for so long is that it is something we’ve dubbed negative that we have to express, but there are rarely areas of life where people can publicly and freely just share those things, otherwise it wouldn’t be shame it would be stuff we’re just waiting to get off our chest. So we need safe places to share, discharge or move that energy around.
The three things that help the most with this are established areas like support groups, who aren’t going to share your secret with others. These are great in that you can meet lots of other people who have had a similar experience and in sharing, and normalizing what you have been through, will lift the burden of shame immeasurably.
The second is through a higher power, any belief systems such as an ancestor, a pet (they keep things to themselves) or any other way to let it known to the universe at large what you are experiencing. Psychologically this brings that mental energy outside of your body and your being and into the world that you experience…it is literally taking outside of your head and putting it somewhere else. Even just writing it down can have this effect. The whole purpose is to unburden you. Shame is a silencing burden. So to fight it we give it a voice and we lighten the load.
Finally, is EFT Tapping? This is the silliest and most fun way to release shame. In this practice, we tap on ourselves, generally near what people call energetic meridians but what I think is going down is that we’re stimulating our bodies, bringing ourselves into the present while saying out loud just what it is that sucks so much.
Run a search on youtube and for EFT tapping to check this out. Emotional Freedom Technique is probably the most potent yet unused tool in my toolbox. It’s fun it’s silly and it really really really works!
There’s no remedy more potent than levity, and doing silly stuff is so frequently the elegant answer to life’s problems, especially when they feel so dark and heavy. With that said it takes community to share with and externalizing our problems to escape the vice of shame and shame that we’re ashamed of!
It’s really that simple! The trick is just to do it and enjoy yourself! Life is far too short to be bogged down by things no matter how large they seem! Invite levity creativity and support into your life and watch the results! I promise it will be profound.