Relationships & The Law Of Attraction

love and relationships

I’ve come across several of friends suffering from relationship issues this week so I decided that there was need for this post.

Relationships are great as soon as you don’t need them. It’s simply the way it works. When we have discovered ourselves to the point where we’re simply not looking for them, the relationships will come, but what do we do?

We grow.

Relationships, like water, seek their own level. We’re simply not going to find the person we’re “looking for” unless we’ve grown to the point where we’re not looking. Or we can settle, which is absolutely fine. In fact, most of us do this, it’s just that we’re settling at a level that is perfect for us for a period of time. 

I’ve done the whole manifest a relationship thing and while it worked, every time, I continually found one thing in common: the relationship was as healthy as I am.

To quote Mooji, “If you’re (single and) looking for the love of your life, you don’t know how lucky you are…” “Finding the love of your life can become a life sentence.”

I’m sure that this isn’t the advice that anyone is looking for. But the hunger to find the perfect person simply arises out of a feeling of being incomplete. Perhaps there’s something deeper that you’re actually craving; a connection, not necessarily romance that is out there.

Romantic relationships are a tool of growth, of happiness and can be incredibly awesome. But they will  challenge you to grow. They will challenge you to even examine your desire for relationships, and that is beautiful.

But like all of life’s beautiful things, they are ultimately transient and more importantly demand growth of some sort and growth is uncomfortable at times. So, I highly suggest a smoother transition. Let go of what doesn’t work and dare to be single. Perhaps you’ll find something deeper and even more fun!

I mean, the point of life is definitely much more blissful and enjoyable than struggle. Why not enjoy yourself and take the easy path until fun finds you?

I don’t intend for this or any of my posts to be definitive truths. I’m actually more interested in what other people have to share than my current truths. I dare to share my perspective to see what other people have to say.

 

 

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Authentic Love

Our love bloomed in the summer; we parted ways in the fall.

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I recently broke up with one of the most amazing women on earth. She was sweet, nurturing, strong, loving, both gentle and powerful. She was exactly the type of partner that I was looking for.

 

 

We spent about half a year together but in that short time she helped change my life and become more myself.

What was amazing about this experience is that we left on wonderful terms and mourned not so much the loss of the other person but the loss of an incredible relationship. One that could not and should not be recreated.

The relationship was based on authenticity, trust, vulnerability, partnership and growth. I learned that I could heal by becoming more of myself. We both held ourselves accountable for our roles in the relationship as well as to being true to ourselves. This allowed us to honestly examine and talk about the dynamics in the relationship.

Both of us being very self aware, we were able to move past old patterns that held us back-from each other and from being the best versions of ourselves.

I’m writing this because real, healthy beautiful love is possible. I’m also writing this because when it was time to part ways, the right thing to do was to leave. Not to cling on for dear life. That would have ruined the beautiful thing that we created between us.

The impermanence of things, especially love is very very real and a reality that we have to accept. What I experienced was the lack of that struggle and grasping onto something that opened my eyes to the beauty of what is possible in life. I also became more aware of who I am through relationship.

I don’t know if I’ll ever engage in a relationship that intensely for a long time. Six months is a blink of an eye but in my life those six months were a gift.

The heartache that I feel is in response to how wonderful this woman was. It is because she and our relationship was so remarkable that I feel sadness. The mourning is not that of regret but of accepting that the beautiful time had blossomed and run its course.

I’m grateful for my time with her. If angels are among us, I spent some of the best months of my life with one of them and I will be forever grateful.

I wish that everyone could have such an experience. My understanding of love has changed forever. It’s possible to be truly seen and appreciated by another. To be heard, and to have the heart of another person bring you home. It’s possible for the warmth of love, an open ear, or a sweet whisper to soothe in the darkest times.

What’s incredible is that just being myself I happened to have profoundly affected her as well. It was just by being genuine and open as well as careful and respectful that we naturally gave each other what we needed.

I’m grateful to have experienced such an elegant short but sweet encounter.

What I expect and what I deserve has expanded and importantly what I am able to give to another has grown exponentially.

Genetic Manipulation, Nuclear Fission and The Law Of Attraction

The law of attraction is basically the belief that what you believe in (read: think a lot about) comes into your life.

The wonderful thing LOA (law of attraction) is that, by definition, it’s the sort of thing that will only work if you believe in it. Or at least have a sneaking suspicion that there’s more going on behind the scenes of life than the naked eye would suggest.

As soon as I found out about this magical law of the universe, I I began applying it with the fervor and foolishness of a recently sexually liberated teenager.

I went through that phase too but it shall never be posted about anywhere ever 🙂

The thing about LOA is that for me it works. And I got really really good at it. I studied and practiced it 24/7 for years.
Practice makes perfect.

I listened to Abraham hicks in my sleep, I watched the movie The Secret around 20 times and much more. After about 5 years I had manifested checks for thousands of dollars, went to my dream school with a free ride. Met and dated women who matched silly amounts of detail and ended up living in houses that met my exact expectations. Oh and there was that AWESOME bender in Vegas that I didn’t know how I was going to pull off but totally did. Still amazes me.

Seems great, right?

To paraphrase Malcolm from Jurassic Park (on the recreation of dinosaurs-also watched that movie 29 times) “Just because I could doesn’t mean that I should.”

All of the relationships ended in tears and heartache. I had to leave that school as I was a mess. My apartment by the mountains with a loft and a fireplace in my room, was a mess and I had to leave. It wasn’t all bad. I had great times, but It was so painful. I had to go on a manifestation hiatus.

Like any other powerful tool, (talking to you, nuclear fission) it had to being guided by wisdom, love, and reason or else it would be destructive.

But I understand the scientists who said “hey-for all we know, detonating an atomic bomb might destroy THE ENTIRE KNOWN UNIVERSE but let’s give it a shot!” It was powerful and tempting. Luckily the analogy ends there.

I did develop the wisdom to guide me through this. I learned that I have to be very specific about what I want, what to create, what is wise sensible and is not based in some absurd fear. I had to know myself first. I had healing to do. And luckily I’ve learned how to use the coolest skill ever: how to re-align my beliefs with a desired outcome.

It’s more like goal setting with a little metaphysical flavor now. I am certain that I will succeed at my goals because they are chosen with care and I have many experiences backing up my ability to achieve them. I’m just capable of being more honest with myself about what they truly are.

I’ll post some manifestation 101 stuff on here. It’s really my favorite thing to talk about, teach about and learn about.

Thanks for reading,
Ammanuel

What is love? My definition, my inspiration and a question for you.

I’m a big fan of self-love. Actually, love in general. While this is hard when in pain depression grief or any situation, it’s often part of the solution as well. Love has gotten me through it all. Especially love from others.

I had to ask myself “what the heck is love anyway?!”

And I learned that it is something that comes before words yet can inform them.

It’s something that I can express within my actions, thoughts and words but can only define for myself.

So let’s define! For me, love is the impulse to connect, to survive and thrive, to grow to share and to protect and nurture.

I suppose it’s analogous to the will to live but it is also life itself.

Some cultures have many different words for different kinds of love. My love of say, my iPhone is one of appreciation of an object that I relate to daily, and there is sentiment attached. I am protective of her and sometimes neglectful. I make sure that she gets recharged while I sleep.

My love of my body is in many ways different. Boy also has needs such as sleep food nurturing, care, is touch sensitive but has a much more intimate relationship with me. I’m a big fan of body too. However I would never ever return him to the apple store for a new one. Very very attached. Without him, this life would end! I’m eternally grateful for this vehicle through the third dimension :p

My love of self, the divine and the souls I encounter along the way is much more sacred to me. This connection I see as eternal. Now while my body and iPhone are very helpful for facilitating connection with other people, it is my love of humanity that is most important to me. It keeps me going. Gives me invaluable purpose that can endure any pain.

It’s this love that has given me the strength to see myself through disease, addiction, hopelessness and despair.

Because I love you guys. And even after years of feeling isolated and disconnected I persevered because I wanted to feel connected to you again.

So thank you, humans for being so wonderful that I want nothing more than to hang out and be a part of the coolest pack of mammals in town (sorry dolphins)

🙂

What does love mean to you? How has it play a role in your life?
– with love, Ammanuel

The importance of Platonic Love and the Fallacy of the “Friend Zone”

A good friend reminded me that while we’re often caught up looking for our soulmate, we get blinded to the many soul-mates who are already in our lives.

Our soul-mates are our best friends with whom we could spend days talking to about pretty much everything. Our soul-mates are there when we need a shoulder to cry on or just as important need someone to talk to or just listen.

I met one of mine recently. Her name is Heather (who happens to have an equally great, yet much longer running website of awesomeness) and it was more of a meeting of two souls who haven’t seen each other for a long time, rather than two strangers bumping into each other at a cafe.

Immediately we hit it off and had tons to talk about and share. We started to talk about books and she mentioned her interest in the book “A Course in Miracles.” Which, by the way is an excellent book and can be had for all of four or so dollars on Amazon.com or any other bookstore. We decided on the spot to start reading it together and met today, for the second time in our lives, to go over the first chapter.

To make a long story short we barely got six pages into it because we basically had twenty something years to catch up on with each other, like old friends seeing each other after years, except we had only met a week ago.

In the past, meeting people with whom I shared so much in common, (spiritual, Awesome, brilliant,and attractive 🙂 I would have been so driven by the need to meet “My soul mate” that I would have confused the situation, tried to date her and messed up a divinely appointed soul meeting.

However this didn’t happen. And it got me thinking. There are probably a lot of people suffering right now form the blinders that our society puts on male/female relationships.

While we are born into these blinders we all have the power to take them off! I’ve heard countless men complain about women who “only want to be their friends” and feel genuinely “stuck” in a friendship role with their female friends whom they are attracted to.

What I had to do was (through painful learning) appreciate the genuine joy, potential and possibilities within all of my relationships when I took a perspective of gratitude for the wonderful people in my life. Instead of thining of what I wanted from the other person, I looked for commonalities and what connections were organically forming.

It’s in these relationships that I find solace, communion and most of all, love without expectations.

Platonic Love is a love that transcends the physical. It’s something that is beautiful, enriching and mutually uplifting.

The wonderful thing is that if you have penned yourself into a cave of friend zone, and are miserable looking for your lover that is not there, just take off your blinders of “i don’t have” and you’ll probably see that all around you are wonderful relationships that can be life changing. And it’s a lot easier being someone’s friend than dating them too! So you can have tons of close enriching friendships with barely any stress! I surely do. And it is Awesome and it creates Winning.